My best one liners

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My best one liners

Post  Simmy on Sat Jan 15, 2011 4:02 pm

Here are some of my best one liners


The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.

I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.

Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.


Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.

There all the ones i can remember Smile Thanks for listening, I have Been Simmy, Goodnight!
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Re: My best one liners

Post  peTeR on Sun Jan 16, 2011 6:02 am

Hedgehogs - Why can't they just share the hedge?
Wink
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Re: My best one liners

Post  mahoney on Sun Jan 16, 2011 6:12 am

peTeR wrote:Hedgehogs - Why can't they just share the hedge?
Wink

Haha, seems familiar
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Re: My best one liners

Post  Simmy on Sun Jan 16, 2011 6:19 am

Stealing my line? Sad Im ashamed.
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Re: My best one liners

Post  peTeR on Sun Jan 16, 2011 7:14 am

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
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Re: My best one liners

Post  Cypher27X on Sun Jan 16, 2011 9:45 am

No wife, no kids, no problems. tongue
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Re: My best one liners

Post  Cypher27X on Sun Jan 16, 2011 11:36 am

peTeR wrote:Hedgehogs - Why can't they just share the hedge?
Wink

I don't get it.....

DERP!
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Re: My best one liners

Post  peTeR on Thu Feb 10, 2011 1:42 pm

Bored and have a few:
What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? your mum
2 peanuts walked down the street, one got assalted
a magician was walking down the street, he turned into a shop
i was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me
a dyslexic walked into a bra
Smile
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Re: My best one liners

Post  Cuckoo on Wed Feb 23, 2011 5:41 pm

A man walks into a bar. At first he is alarmed, but is relieved to find he is okay. However, he soon realised some people had seen him- and all they could do was laugh.

The news spread fast- soon, everyone was mocking him. Ridiculed by his peers, he was made redundant and soon found no jobs would be given to him due to his reputation. His children lost all respect for him and his guidance, and turned to drugs and alcohol- dying at a young age. His wife leaves him for his ex-boss, and in the divorce hearing she takes all the money, the car and the house.

He spends the rest of his life alone, growing old and bitter, spending his days pondering on what could have been and waiting to die.

Ouch.
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Re: My best one liners

Post  Lorenzo666 on Thu Feb 24, 2011 4:52 am

Lawl
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Re: My best one liners

Post  Boxintops on Fri Feb 25, 2011 1:35 am

my sig

5char
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Re: My best one liners

Post  Lorenzo666 on Fri Feb 25, 2011 3:40 am

FAIL
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Re: My best one liners

Post  Someone who buggered off. on Mon Mar 14, 2011 2:12 pm

I had sex with my girlfriend last night. It was going pretty good, except the entire time she was screaming someone elses name... Anyone know who rape is?

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Re: My best one liners

Post  mattb on Thu Apr 28, 2011 9:33 am

do you work on a chicken farm? because you sure know howw to raise cocks

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Re: My best one liners

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